Saberhagendaaz
Shakεy
Business_Socks
ClintonPortisheadFiled under: Saberhagendaaz | Tags: Anquan Boldin, Bullshit Excuses to Avoid Going to the White House, James Harrison, Pittsburgh Steelers, Point/Counterpoint, President Bush, President Obama, Satanism
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Recently, Steelers linebacker James Harrison made headlines by choosing not to accompany the Steelers to the White House for a visit with President Obama. To get to the bottom of this controversy, Style Points invited President Obama and Mr. Harrison for a gentlemanly debate on the topic. Here is a transcript of the exchange:
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Filed under: Saberhagendaaz | Tags: mailbag, David Souter, Richard Posner, Thurgood Marshall, Circus Train, Wanda from Yonkers, Midgets, Property Law, Handel on the Law, Circuit City, Eminem, Dr. Dre, Proctology, Gulptability, Sonia Sotomayor, President Obama
Ron Artest, friend of Style Points, recently visited headquarters to answer a mailbag. Much to our surprise, he wanted to answer legal questions, not unlike his favorite AM radio program, Handel on the Law. It turns out Ron has been reading up on the law in anticipation of a post-basketball occupation now that his connections at Circuit City aren’t worth much. So, while noting that Ron is not an actual attorney and is in no way authorized to give legal advice, we now turn it over to him to answer your legal questions.
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Filed under: Saberhagendaaz | Tags: Corey McIntyre, Public Masturbation, Bicycle Rides, Strokin' It, Things to do in Buffalo
McIntyre (wardrobe by Ed Hardy)
Bills running back Corey McIntyre allegedly took excessive measures to practice his no-huddle offense. The journeyman back faces a misdemeanor exposure of sexual organs charge after a 59-year old woman told police that she heard a knock at her window, then witnessed McIntyre masturbating outside. There has been no report as to what he used to knock on the window.
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Filed under: Saberhagendaaz | Tags: 420, Craigslist, France, Housing, Infected Philly Residents, Infectious Diseases, Michael Vick, Sonia Rolland
As our loyal readership is already aware, Style Points’ own Business_Socks recently broke the story of a roommate-wanted ad on Craigslist that we opined might have been placed by Michael Vick.
Socks asked me to follow-up on the piece, and through intrepid reporting I was able to learn the identity of the person that posted the ad. In exchange for keeping his identity secret, my anonymous source graciously provided me with all of the email responses to the ad, which I now have the pleasure of sharing with you.
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Filed under: Saberhagendaaz | Tags: Al Davis, Blood Types, Hearse, Prius, Spanish Inquisition, Filipinos, Tim Brown, Tony Gonzales, Chinamen
Recently, Tim Brown suggested that Al Davis doesn’t like black people. It was just like when Kanye West said the same thing about George Bush, except that in this case it’s not true. To make sure no further mistakes like this happen, Style Points sent Mr. Davis a questionnaire about his likes and dislikes. Here are his answers:
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Filed under: Saberhagendaaz | Tags: House, Manny Ramirez, Tumors, Nightmare Fuel, Scott Boras, Putt-putt, Gumball Machines
[Pasadena, CA: MANNY RAMIREZ is floating in his pool, wearing water-wings. Nearby, construction workers are laying concrete for 9-hole putt-putt course.]
MANNY [arms thrashing, starting to panic]: Manny camping! Manny camping!
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