Deadspin Commenter Big Board
We at Style Points love Deadspin. So we’ve decided to honor the best of the best by compiling a top 25 Commenter Big Board. We’ve excluded ourselves, because that wouldn’t be fair.
…Right?
1. Gourmet Spud-The bona fide number one. He’s from a different commenting planet.
2. Weed Against Speed- If Spud had just stayed on Krypton we’d all be singing the praise of this comedic genius daily. Also, check out his blog Sportress of Blogitude.
3. Brazil Thrill- Though he’s been scarce lately, when he does appear it’s something you won’t want to miss.
4. Len Bias Coke Surplus- His ridiculous one liners have us all rolling on the floor with laughter.
5. Arkansas Fred- “ArkansasFred is establishing himself as the premiere name in luxury imports” His Deadspin status says it all. I think.
6. Civil Negligence- The fellow Philadelphian has mastered the comedy pyriamid.
7. Stev D-CPSL’s archenemy flat out brings the funny.
8. Chuck Knoblockhead- The Rookie is only on this list because he mailed us a crisp Benjamin. Though he does rack up high +1 levels for some reason.
9. Suss-The old time commenter has turned his commenting success into liveblogging masterpieces.
10.dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese-mac- RYLAI killer has a long ass name.
11. Hustler of Culture- Old schooler knows how to party.
12. 289-Off finding himself in East Bumblefuck, the legendary photoshop man has been known to entertain the masses with brilliant one liners.
13. Dany Heatley Speedwagon- I suddenly have the urge to listen to ‘Take It On the Run’.
14. Hatey McLife- Get this man a star ASAP. Briliance oozes through his fingertips. [Okay, he got his star. Nice]
15. David Hume- The man with the philosophizing handle…well he’s good.
16. I Party With Smoot- Don’t go double duty Smooty on our asses please.
17. BigTenObsession- BTO is not only a voice of reason on DUAN but a voice of hilarity during the day.
18. Phil Mickelson’s Man Tits-The legendary PMMT thesis is just the tip of the iceberg for this funny man.
19. Kid Canada- This Canuck can make any Yankee laugh.
20. CoolHwhip-Wait, huh?
21. Artie Fufkin-Alabama Artie brings the heat.
22. UkraineNotWeak- Deadspin’s designated Mets fan is the king of dry humor.
23. Mr Red Devil-The dirty penises in butts king brings the nasty bathroom funnies.
24. Karlifornia- Had a whimsical comment based on the famous ‘Footprints’ poem that he translated into fellatio. And we were in awe.
25. Bobby_Big_Wheel-Fake Klosterman Twitterer sneaks into our big board, but can hang with the big boys.
Receiving Votes: Chris Hanson’s Axe, White Speed Receiver, Peter Cavan, Doyle McPoyle, formerly Chief Wahoo, Slothrop, Upstate Underdog, FEAST, OchentaYCinco. 44 in a Row, crazyjoedavola, Afino, Sports-Pun, Jefferson Tardship, X-tacle, The Mentalist!, Athens_Greece, Her?, Laser Guided
So you feel like you got snubbed? Email us at stylepointsblog@gmail.com and tell us why. We might care. But probably not.
*Receiving votes are not in a particular order. So Chris Hanson’s Axe, don’t feel special.
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I give this list 13.7 out of 14.2 Dirty Penises In The Butt! Good job fuckrods.
Being on receiving votes is the nicest thing that has ever happened to me. And I’m including that time Ronnie Woo Woo called me up and said, “Her?”
“Yeah?”
“It’s Ronnie Woo Woo.”
“Hello Ronnie.”
“Hey, how bout those Cubs?”
“How bout em, Ronnie?”
“They’re great. Well, I gotta run. Nice talking to you.”
“You too Ronnie.”
thank you for the receiving votes, I will add this site to my blog that 3 read.
*that 3 people read.
/I’m an idiot
Where’s PrettyPinkPrincess on this list? I call foul!
me
The Deadspin comments are generally miserable. Glad someone can stand out amongst all the shit.
Get a life you fucking losers.
Not sure what is sadder… the fact I’m pissed I didn’t garner “Also Receiving Votes” status.. or the fact I actually read the list and was trying to determine if I agreed with the rankings or not.
I’m ahead of THE MENTALIST!?
Did a Puerto Rican count these votes?..
Wait Shakey, BS, CPH, and Saber have a fucking blog?! Where the fuck have I been?
God damnit Shakey, I too have the compromising photos of you and daaz that coolhwhip has, don’t make me reveal them!
Dammit, I guess I should have worked on my oral skills to try and make the Top 10.
– BTO
Hey father of 2 future first rounders, you’re not on the list because you seem to be way more concerned with being first than being funny.
#11, sweeeeeeeeeeet
That’s it, that’s my great contribution for the day
Be sure to check out the rest of the fine articles here, fellas.
We’re just 50 bucks short of raising enough for Shakey’s new liver.
Also receiving votes makes me feel all funny in my pants.
What Shakey doesn’t tell you is that “Benjamin” is really a twelve year old Taiwanese boy.
hey, i’m mr. irrelevant!
@supermike.
Banned.
@ anonymous
I don’t care about being first…It just happens. Why so angry?
excluding wonderlicmyballs and Her? is heresy. whoever compiled this list does not read ds enough.
It is now my goal to become the best commenter on StylePoints and just hope that someday there is a spinoff blog that ranks StylePoint’s best commenters. I am destined for big things
@Wonderlickmyballs?
Her? is on the list, Wonderlic was a mistake. He’ll be on the next edition, I promise.
This is Shakey for Style Points news.
JohnnyDakotaU: +10 Style Points
Regardless of what some randoms think of my grumbling…which was for fun…I really enjoyed this list. Nice job.
I’m just honoured to show up on this.
I think we have a new winner for nerdiest blog post in the history of the Internets.
Stick around Sean, the year is young.
What the FUCK?!? It’s like you’ve only been reading Deadspin for about 2 months. Your list is incredibly short-sighted, doesn’t have a single dick joke, finish-the-joke-for-me line, or any other long-standing meme.
Shame on you, good sirs, shame on you indeed.
Why, you li’l…
#10,403 – Two Yellows Equal Red.
/knows where he stands
How can you have a list like this and exclude Hit Bull Win Steak?
@2Y=R:
I’m #10,404. Chin up.
Hit Bull Win Steak was an omission. We’re still working the kinks out here.
Geez, I couldn’t even get a sympathy vote from you assholes?
[...] Deadspin Commenter Big Board [...]
Utterly speechless.