Style Points

Due to recent events, the NFL has ordered an investigation into the trend of injuries to star National Football Conference linebackers.

With injuries to such NFC stars as Stewart Bradley, Brian Urlacher, Antonio Pierce, EJ Henderson, and on Sunday, DeMarcus Ware, the trend of injuries to star NFC linebackers seems to be picking up pace and growing exponentially.

Former NFC linebackers Dan Morgan and Chris Claiborne, who suffered injuries during their careers and are now outspoken advocates of player rights regarding injuries to interconference brethren, will be meeting with commissioner Roger Goodell on Wednesday to discuss fears, worries, and possible solutions to the epidemic. (more…)

Due to pending litigation, we are no longer posting new content to Style Points. Thanks to everyone for reading the site and making it more fun than any of us deserved.

FUCK YOU HASSELHOFF!

IMAGE REMOVED

SHAKEY FAREWELL

I was taking a picture of our purple Christmas tree and Purple Jesus came on to supervise. And to chill me to my core.

Sorry everybody, it’s holiday season and we’re all out of whack. It happens sometimes. Just pretend we’re posting stuff and go on with your business. May I suggest a Healthy Living With George Karl to appease you?

I’ll start writing again tonight, though I know you really want some quality Business_Socks/ClintonPortishead. BUT I WILL HAVE TO DO. CPH is too busy sleeping off his 24th birthday weekend and Socks has got some livestock slaying on his mind. Let’s all hold hands and pray for the life of Eloise the Nanny goat.

In other news, I have scored some free tickets for the Philadelphia Eagles bowling bash where we bowl with the Eagles and snobbishly critique their first half performances. I’ll be there to give them touchdown celebration ideas. So CHA and I will be attending. Get jealous.

Just for you, Socks.

So, that was… a game last night, huh? Whatever, Jake Delhomme. Whaaaaatever.

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Because I am friends with a few nature freaks, my facebook feed has informed me that “Officials want to kill 80 percent of the deer in Valley Forge. They’re “over populated”. People can’t see that the earth was not made for man. We just live on it. We’re overpopulated too.” Apparently people aren’t happy with this and are freaking out because “Oh, humans aren’t the only ones on this earth! We have to respect the animals! Think of Bambi! Wah wah!”

Well Style Points could give two shits about those raccoon humpin’ assholes. In fact, we’re all for the mindless killing of 1,500 deer. Not because they ’cause environmental damage, vehicle crashes, and Lyme disease’ like this article says, but because we want in on the shooting. (more…)

Yep, yep.  More football tonight Last Call patrons.  Being that we’re renowned for our accurate predictions I’ll lay one out right here before the jump.  You’re going to be seeing more of Jake Delhomme’s fail face tonight.

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We are lazy people.  Doing shit bums us out.  While perusing Fox Sports yesterday we ran across this collection of pictures.  We want to make fun of it.  How’s about we make broad generalizations that actually say more about us and our hate-filled point of view than the individual in the picture?  Won’t you join us?

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Our old friend John Daly posted the underlying picture on his Twitter account last night. We say you follow JD’s lead on this hump day: grip it and rip it, folks!

Morning Links

Bookmarkin’ time: Rick Chandler launches a new blog on NBCSports.com. [Out of Bounds]

A collection of awesome NFL cheap shots. [Unathletic]

New Mexico soccer assassin vixen Elizabeth Lambert has a dating video. [Outside the Boxscore]

SHIRTLESS DUDE FIGHT!!! [With Leather]

Going 1 for 16 is enough to be King of Detroit. [Detroit4Lyfe]

Yeah, right. And Rob Ryan had a beard! [Second String Fullback]

Grading Pau Gasol’s performance on CSI: Miami. SIIIIIIIIIIII! [That NBA Lottery Pick]

Is this newsworthy? No. Should it be? YOU BETCHA. According to this website that is just an acronym, Tony Gonzalez has secured the ultimate gig for a man with a rockin’ bod. Appearing naked on a poster. Unfortunately, he did it wrong. I hereby call Tony Gonzalez and his wife out for being a couple of two-faced lying philandering sack of asbestos in a room full of asthmatic kindergartners for appearing in an anti-fur ad where they claim to be naked when in fact they were actually wearing clothing ALL ALONG.

According to the aforementioned website Gonzalez stated that “We had clothes on.” (more…)

Lots of good stuff to get into this week, kiddies.  Not only do we offer groundbreaking breakdowns of every NFL game, we also cover dominoes, Whataburger, Navajo broacast teams and middle fingers.  All this and more in your MONDAY.  MORNING.  RECKONING!

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I guess we’re late in sharing this one but, anytime is a good time if you’ve got a fat, black Han Solo mixing it up with drunk, moonwalking Ewoks

Links

Never, EVER promise Spud a slice of pizza and fail to deliver.  [Food Court Lunch]

Chicks in bikinis…playing golf. [With Leather]

Sir Charles has a little fun at Sammy Sosa’s expense. [Last Angry Fan]

The most bizarre moments in the history of the world’s most ridiculous show (or something).  [TV Without Pity]

The five best dunks from last week. [NESW Sports]

These player is goodnot.

Peter King’s mid-season All-Pro and awards picks came out yesterday, and rather than simply laugh at them, we decided to make our own awards. Being that we’re Style Points and completely awesome, we decided to go the opposite route: who, this season, has been awful? Who has stunk so bad even Terri Schiavo had to plug up her nose? Who in the league has been the most responsible for the failures of their team? Which players ARE the weakest link? Here it is, Style Points’s midseason NOT-Pro Awards.

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Trust me, you want to watch this.

Links

Fastest soccer goal evah?  Mebbe.  [Sportress]

Your weekly fantasy rundown. [2nd String Fullback]

Did you guys hear Tyson punched out a photographer?  [With Leather]

Want sex advice from bloggers?  Yeah, me neither. [KSK]

Delusional people working for Al Davis?  Never!  [Last Angry Fan]

Yep, yep.  The Thursday night games are upon us. Oh, looks like we caught you off guard.  It’s Bears/49ers tonight.  So, go adjust your fantasy rosters (put some pants on) and get back here.  That is of course, unless you’re playing the Pitino Supper Club this week.  HAHA!  Seriously though, we aint’ got time to fuck around.  Let’s get busy commenting.  Oh, and p.s. – fuck you Mike Tyson for getting arrested…

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